Not So Fragile
by Demon Vampire180
Summary: Ichigo is falling madly in love with some one but isn't able to express it. What he doesn't know is that the person he loves is crushing on him too. Yaoi Rating for safety. Briefly edited.
1. Ichigo's Point Of View

Authors Note: To my faithful readers, I beg you to forgive me for all the OOC's. It tends to make the story line easier to deal with. Please bear with me.

Disclaimer: In NO WAY do I own Bleach or it's characters. This is made by fan and meant to be read by fans.

Enjoy ^_^

* * *

(Ichigo's Room: Late Afternoon)

There was nothing better to do on a boring Saturday afternoon. I leaned back in my bed, resting my head on folded hands, and thought about how much _HELL_ I'd brought to soul society. I was lucky they didn't kill me as soon as everything was over. Of course, there was one _other _thing I couldn't keep my mind off. Well, one other_ person _actually.

I hadn't told anyone this because I was embarrassed and tended to flush a deep red even thinking about it but I was in love with one of the Vice-Captains of the thirteen protection squads. I thought about it over and over again but every time I did, it brought me to the same conclusion.

I was deeply, and utterly, in love with Aberai Renji.

I shuddered as I thought about the battle that had almost killed the red-headed man. I remembered every cut, every slash, in his body that I had made. He almost died telling me I had to save Rukia. I already knew that and it pissed me off, watching as he fought for air, to tell me to save some one else. Of course I realized that had been my main purpose, saving Rukia.

My jealousy over whelmed me but regardless I went and saved Kuchki Rukia from evils clutches. Aizen made things worse escaping to Hueco Mundo (Sorry for bad spelling). The whole time I was saving her I couldn't keep my thought from wandering to _him_. The bastard just had to pop up _everywhere_ I went. His tattoo's tantalized me, controlling my mind with a maze of designs. I wanted to beat the shit out of him but could do nothing.

---

I jumped when I heard a knock at my door. A young girls voice, muffled because of the door called, "Ichi-nii! Dinner's ready."

"What? Oh. Ok, I'll be there in just a minute." I answered. I knocked on my closet door and pulled it open. Rukia sat in one corner, with a flashlight, reading a book. "Dinner time. You know the drill."

Sighing, she jumped out of the closet, fixed her rumpled clothes and jumped out the window. I watched her land softly on the ground and start walking swiftly to the front of the house.

I took my time walking down the stair and rushed, only pretending, to the front door when the door bell rang. I swung it open, putting on a surprised, slightly shocked face. "Rukia-chan, what are you doing here?" I asked, hoping my voice wouldn't give me away.

A booming, rather grating voice, called from down the hall, "Rukia-chan? What's Rukia-chan doing here?" Kurosaki Ishhin came rushing down the hall, wearing a goofy pair of pj pants and a loose fitting plain white t-shirt.

Routinely, Rukia put on the water works. Quietly, she sobbed, "M-my parents were in a car crash a-and I didn't know what to do. I-I went back to the house to find it had burned down so I have no money and no source of f-food. I thought t-that maybe, just m-maybe, you could house me?" Rukia gave my father a watery glance, playing her role perfectly.

Isshin had been moved to tears and looked at me. "That's a load of bull shit. She comes here every other week with the same story. You can't _really_ believe her can you dad?" I asked, my role perfectly played out as well.

Yuzu, who had seemed to have popped out from no where said, her face streaked with tears, "N-nii-san how can you be so mean? We can at least feed her and give her shelter until her parents are well."

I slapped my face, knowing, and slightly hoping, things would play out as they usually did. Both of us realized how much of an idiot my father was but none of us ever bothered to say anything. "You know what? Fine. She can do what ever she damn well wants."

Yuzu's face immediately brightened. I couldn't help but smile. Yuzu was fragile and tended to break a lot easier than her almost twin sister Karin. "Really? Oh _thank you_ Nii-chan!" Yuzu jumped on me and hugged with all her might.

"Yuzu, you're suffocating him." Said another, irritated, female voice. Karin stood staring at the four of us, her face bored, lifeless. "Let go of him already."

Yuzu let go, and left me gagging for air.

"Come on let's go. Dinner's getting cold." We followed her to the kitchen and sat at the table. We thanked who ever it is that we thank for the food and began to shove the food down our throats.

_Damned shinigami. _Karin thought, glaring at Rukia from across the table. _I sometimes wished I didn't have any spirit powers just so I didn't have to know that you and _him_ were doing things privately together. Every time Ichigo disappears for days, weeks, at a time, she usually goes too. She almost _always_ has something to do with his disappearances_

"Karin, is something wrong?" I asked my younger sister, seeing the distraction in her eyes.

She snapped into a straighter position and said, "What? Oh, yeah. I'm fine."

"You seem distracted." Her father said, general concern actually showing for once.

"Not really." She turned to Rukia and asked, "I'm just curious. How long have you been living here?"

Rukia, as though this wasn't such an unusual question, answered, "Less than a year. We lived in America for awhile but we decided we needed a change."

"For some one who's only lived in Japan for less than a year, you speak Japanese quite fluently." Karin ricocheted back.

Choking a little Rukia answered quickly, "I've had a lot of tutoring. I'm a quick learner. I also took Japanese back in the states." Her lie was quickly becoming more evident.

Before Karin could ask anymore question I cut in curtly, "Karin, quit bombarding her with all the questions. She's here and so what if she is?"

Karin glared hard at me, her face showing anger and disappointment. "You want to know why?" Her voice was slowly rising, her anger all spilling out all at once. "Every freaking time you disappear, so does she. You disappear with out a trace, with out telling _anyone_ where the hell you are and then when you do come back you're either all beaten up or depressed. When that happens, you refuse to talk to _anybody_! You don't come down and eat and the only time you leave you room is to shower or use the bathroom." She was breathing like an angry bull, through her nostrils and hard. You could almost imagine steam coming out of her ears.

She stood up, grabbed her plate and said quietly, "Excuse me." She put her plate in the sink and stormed upstairs, still fuming.

The four of us still sitting at the table watched her disappear into her bedroom, slamming the door hard behing her. "Is it something I did?" Rukia asked quietly. I saw how upset she actually was about the situation. She hadn't ever meant to worry any of my family but we never really had time to give a formal good-bye. Most of the time, things happened as a spur of the moment situation.

Shaking his head, Isshin said quietly, "No. She just... Ichigo is an important part of her life and she's constantly worrying about him. Maybe if he would tell us where he was going once in awhile, we wouldn't have this problem."

Wincing when he said this I realized it was true. Sighing, I stood up and said to the rest of them, "I'll go talk to her."

Rukia, standing up too said, "I'll come-"

"No." I said firmly. "This is something between me and my sister." Rukia sank slowly back into her chair, the authority in my voice startling her.

"Yeah. Sure." She cleared her throat and resumed eating slowly. _I must of really upset his sister. I didn't mean to. I mean, I know that Ichigo is important to his family but he's also important to me. Damn it. Why is life so complicated?_

Isshin and Yuzu watched as Rukia brought the food to her mouth and then attempting to put in her mouth. Almost every time she missed, putting more food on herself than in her stomach.

"Rukia-chan?" Yuzu placed one hand on top of Rukia's.

She looked up and shook her head, clearing it. _Oh shit. _"Um, can I use your shower?" Rukia gave them a rather sheepish smile, only then realizing all of the food she had wasted, dumping most of it on herself.

"S-sure" Isshin replied, holding back a laugh.

Rukia got up and walked up the stairs to the shower. _I'll help clean up later._

---

In my sister's bedroom, Karin lay face down on her bed, resting her head on her hands. Knocking, I entered quietly and called out, "Karin?"

She didn't answer me.

I went over to the bed and sat down next to her, resting my hand on her back. She stirred just a little bit, trying to shake my hand off her back. Sighing I said, "I'm sorry for always making you worry about me Karin. Just that, I'm out trying to save the world from being engulfed in evil. You know that. You've known all along that I'm a god damn Shinigami."

Karin, her voice muffled, said, "I know. But that still doesn't give you the right to just randomly disappear from here. Where do you go every time? Yuzu worries more than I do and I feel guilty that I can't tell her for sure that you're safe and that I know exactly where you are. It's just... We need you more than you think."

"Yeah. I know."

Karin sat up slowly and I let my hand drop to the bed. "From now on, leave a note that you're going to be gone for awhile and that you're going to be with... _her_." She practically spat the last word and you could hear the clear dislike of Rukia in her voice.

"What do you have against Rukia-chan anyway?"

"She's stolen you from us. Damn shinigami." She muttered under her breath.

I hit her lightly over the head and said playfully, "It's not nice to damn your own brother."

She hissed at me, glared, and said, "You know what I mean."

"Ha ha. I know." I ruffled her hair and walked out the door.

---

Rukia stood under the warm water and couldn't stop herself from thinking about all the trouble she had caused Ichigo's family. _Every time I'm around, Ichigo ends up getting in trouble. We end up going to Soul Society, he saves the world, comes to a devastated family. He has to come up with a lie every time to tell his family. It must be hard lieing to his family every time, re-explaining his reason for being gone for so long._

Rukia jumped when she heard a knock at the door. "Rukia-chan? You don't have any clothes with you right? Come to my room and I can see if I have any thing that fits you."

"Um, sure." Rukia replied, turning off the water. She grabbed the towel hanging on a rack next to the shower, wrapping it around her small frame. She took a quick look in the mirror and opened the door, looking both ways to make sure neither Ichigo or his father were around.

She walked quickly to Yuzu and Karin's bedroom, knocking before entering. Karin was leaning against the wall reading a book and Yuzu was digging through their closet looking for something that Rukia could wear.

Rukia cleared her throat. Yuzu jumped and looked up from what she was doing. "Oh, Rukia-chan, I can't seem to find anything for you."

"May I?" Rukia eyed the closet.

"Go ahead." Rukia walked up to the closet but before she grabbed anything Yuzu stopped her. She leaned up on her tip toes and whispered, "Show me first though. I don't think Karin wants you taking her clothes." She gave Rukia a pleading look and Rukia was glad to comply.

Rukia dug through the closet for about five minutes before finding what she had wanted. It was the dress she had worn the last time she had been in the real world before the Soul Society incident. She showed it to Yuzu and she nodded in agreement. At least she hadn't been wearing Karin's dress for those two months.

"Um, may I also have some pajamas I can wear for tonight. I'll leave tomorrow." Rukia asked quietly, afraid that if she said anything to loudly Karin would blow her top again.

"Sure."

Rukia went back to the closet and took out the yellow checkered PJ's she'd gotten so used to wearing. Yuzu nodded and Rukia sighed in relief yet again. "Um, Rukia-chan? Where will you sleep?"

"I have some place special. Don't worry, just get some shut eye. I'll see you in the morning." Rukia turned away, knowing that she hadn't meant to tell such a lie. She'd be out of the house before anyone, even Ichigo, woke up.

Rukia slipped out the door, closing it quietly behind her, and walked quickly to her, _sleeping quarters_.

---

I turned my head when I heard the door latch click. I sat up quickly when I saw Rukia. Color creeped to my face as I slowly took in that she was only wearing a towel and was dripping wet.

When she saw this she glared and demanded, "What? Never see a woman in a towel before?"

I thought quietly, _It's not that. I've _seen_ a _naked_ woman before and it was rather uncomfortable. _I turned my head away from her and answered quietly, "N-no actually. I've never see a woman, wrapped _only_ in a towel before."

She laughed quietly, sarcastically. "Hm, still innocent? Then, maybe your young eyes aren't ready..." She let the towel drop to the ground. "For this."

She laughed harder when I screamed, girly like, and shoved my head under my pillow. From underneath I yelled, "Hurry and get dressed! Damn! Are you trying to get me to lose my fucking virginity before I'm twenty?"

"Maybe." Her voice was less sarcastic now.

"Are you fucking with me?" I yelled again.

"No. But I'd like to fuck you."

"You know what? Never mind." I got up and walked blindly over to my light switch, fumbling with it. I flicked the light off and stumbled back to my bed. "Get dressed in the dark. I'm going to bed!"

Rukia laughed, her voice hollow, unwelcoming. She dressed quickly, now clearly ignoring me, climbed in her closet and I listened as we both fell into a deep sleep, our breathing even and calm.


	2. Renji's Point Of View

_**NOTE:**_ _Any touchy-_feely_ parts of the story start next chapter. The POV are just for a beginning so people can see how they actually feel. Make sense?_

---

**Renji's Point Of View**

I sat staring at the clear moon on top of my small apartment. I had decided that, after the Soul Society incident, I wanted to remain in the living world. I wore my gigai most of the time but I shook my self out of it sometimes. And, even though I was still in the living in the real world, I was still Vice-Captain of the sixth squad. My captain said that he didn't care either way. He also mentioned, which I think he had meant to keep to himself, that I was a bit of a nuisance.

It had upset me, but as usual, I just shrugged it off as another one of his random comments. So after what seemed to be a lot, I ended up where I am. On the top of an apartment building in the real world.

Of course, there was one other reason I was here that no one else knew about. At least, I hoped no one else knew about. That one reason I ask? I was madly in love with the god damn substitute shinigami of the real world. Known to most as, Kurosaki Ichigo.

I jumped back to reality when I heard a knock at one of the apartments doors. I turned on my stomach and belly crawled to the edge and peered over it. I nearly gasped when I saw who it was. I swung over the edge and landed cat-like on the balcony of the apartment complex.

"Hitsugaya-taicho, Rangiku-san. What are you doing here?" I asked, trying hard to suppress my surprise and failing miserably. "Or, when did you get here? I didn't feel your reitsu." (no comments about spelling. It's obvious already that I can't.)

The young white haired shinigami turned around to look at me, and glared. "We're not allowed to drop by from time to time?"

The other, taller, larger, of the two slapped me on the back and said, "Konbonwa, Renji-san. O-genki desu?"

"I-I'm fine Rangiku-fukutaicho. " I coughed as the woman slapped me repeatedly on the back, causing me to choke on spit. "And of course you can...visit. It's just rather...unexpected?" I said, searching for the right word.

Matsumoto's eyes widened. "Are you doing something dirty with a human girl?"

I coughed hard again, feeling as though I was going to lose my stomach in the process. "W-what? That's absurd!"

She wriggled her eyebrows at me, clearly saying she didn't believe me. Tenth squads captain cleared his throat to get my attention. "_Is_ now a bad time?" He asked, his voice low, and to my surprise, generally concerned.

"What? Oh, no. I was just thinking about things up on the roof-'

"I wondered where you'd come from." Matsumoto interrupted.

I had lost my train of thought and said instead, "Just, come on in. Make yourselves comfortable."

"How do afford this?" Hitsugaya asked, showing some _"general" _interest. I saw his eyes flit across the room, examining everything there. His eyes worked over the room, examining the couch, the low set coffee table, the kitchen, and his eyes lingered longest on my bedroom door.

I had made my way to the kitchen to make tea. While pulling out the teapot, I called out to the living room, "I have a job as a police officer. It pays well and this really isn't all that expensive. It's one of the cheaper places actually." The water had warmed up so I put it on a tray and brought it out. I set a glass in front of both of them and sat cross legged on the other side of the table.

"A police officer huh? Must be nice. You must pick up a lot of girls." Rangiku piped, here eyes wide and hopeful again.

"Yeah. I guess." _Except I've got my eyes set on a whole other goal of a whole other gender. _My flushed pink as I thought about it.

"What sized chest girl do you like?"

"R-Rangiku-fukutaicho!" I stammered. "That is really none of your concern."

Rangiku stopped for a minute and stared at the ceiling,before saying. "Or maybe, you're not into the girls? There's perhaps a... another male, that's caught your interest?"

"W-what?" I jumped to my feet, startled that she would think such a thing.

"Whoops," she smiled a huge quarter-moon smile, "did I say that out loud?"

Hitsugaya slapped himself in the face and let his hand slide across that. "Matsumoto! Now _that's_ what I call absurd."

"It would be if she wasn't right," I muttered, mostly to myself. With their sharp sense of hearing, regretfully, they had heard.

"Renji-fukutaicho of sixth squad, what did you just say?" demanded the young white haired captain.

"I _said_, 'it would be if she wasn't right.' I am in love with some one and that some one isn't a large breasted woman like it should be." I admitted, shrugging my shoulders. "I have fallen in love with-"

"Oh let me guess! Please oh please let me guess!" The blond said, almost jumping from wall to wall.

"S-sure." I agreed.

"Is it some one _we_ know?" She asked, her eyes wide and childish.

"Yes." I answered dully, not wanting this to turn into a game of twenty questions.

"Is he a shinigami?"

"Kind of."

Hitsugaya interrupted with, "How can it be '_kind of_'? He either is or isn't."

"Shut yer trap. He's 'kind of' a shinigami. Just keep guessing."

"Is he in the human world?"

"Yes." I watched as the anticipation slowly grew across the vice-captains face. She was thoroughly enjoying this.

"Ok, if he _is _a shinigami, does he rank at all in the thirteen protection squads?"

Sighing, I answered, reluctantly of course, "No."

She stopped and I watched as a devilish grin crossed her face. She mouthed 'oh my god.' "Taicho, he's in love with the substitute shinigami of this town, Kurosaki Ichigo!"

His jaw dropped and he turned to stare at me. "I-is that true?" I nodded. For some reason, I got the feeling that he was holding back laughter. You could see the smile pulling at the edges of his lips. He obviously found this very amusing.

"Does he know that?" He couldn't help but to snicker a little when he opened his mouth to talk.

"Of course not! And it's of course going to be kept that way! He doesn't even know I'm in the living world and he has no need to know either." I shouted. It was irritating, having them... interrogate me like this. My face had flushed bright scarlet, making my black wave of tattoo's almost blend in with my skin.

Rangiku let out a monstrous laugh. "What _are _you thinking? If you want him, take him. He won't know unless you tell him."

"If I tell him and he says no, than there will be some awkwardness between us. That would be terrible." I looked at her, my face a lot less scarlet now.  
"Well, if you _don't _tell him, he'll end up getting stolen away by some one else and then you'll have _no_ chances of having him as your own." Rangiku gave a gentle smile. She understood how it felt to want to tell some one how you felt but you weren't sure just _ how_ to tell them. Up until the most recent incident, she'd had her eyes set on the sneaky bastard of a devil, Ichimaru Gin.

I let my self drop to floor so I could sit cross legged again. I stared at the floor, picking at the carpet. I was confused because they were so calm about all of it. With out looking up I muttered, slightly under my breath, "How come you're so calm about this? You just find out that one of the vice-captains are in love with another male and you're talking like it's nothing."

Rangiku gave me a confused look. "Shouldn't we be happy? One of our own is in love. Doesn't matter if they're in love with the same sex."

Hitsugaya, who seemed to have regained composure said, "Love is love regardless of who it is that you love." He crossed his arms across his chest and stared hard at me, as if he were trying to see some hidden meaning behind me emotions.

I shrugged, letting my eyes wonder across the room, noticing, but not really seeing, the other two people in the room. They were right and I knew it but I couldn't believe it. I looked up at them and begged, my eyes pleading, "Please don't tell any one about this. Especially not my captain."

"We can't do that. If there's an emergency, your captain needs to know you're in the real world and _why_ you're there. Sorry Renji but rules are rules." Hitsugaya said, his voice _almost_ apologetic. There was also a note of sarcasm and I knew that he was making that up but _I _was in no position to tell _him_ what to do.

"F-fine. But can you please keep it between you three? I really don't need this getting out to _every body_."

"I wouldn't worry to much about it but... There's been a... rumor, going around that Yumichika and Ikakku are going at it. It's still an uncomformed report but, it's helpful. It's not that unusual for you to be the way you are. Sometimes it just happens." Matsumoto said, her voice kind; her gentle eyes caring. This was the first time I had ever seen Rangiku Matsumoto like this. She was calm, but her thoughts weren't in a present day time. They had flown off to a time when _she_ had known love. She didn't want others to be hurt either.

"Thanks. It's getting late," _Actually it was _already_ late but, oh well. _"Are you staying here or are you going back? If you're staying I'll have to get the futons and stuff out so you'll have to wait for maybe half-an-hour." I offered, hoping they weren't staying.

"No. We need to get back to Soul Society and report. The towns safe, you're crazy, which means that nothing has changed." Hitsugaya said, sarcasm showing in his voice despite his emotionless face.

I got up and sighed. "Yes yes now get out, give your report and if the captain starts laughing bash his face in will you?" I asked, shoving the two of the out the door.

Right before the door slammed shut I heard them say together, "Sure sure. Later loverboy."

---

(Soul Society: Sixth Squads Office)

Byakuya sat at his desk, working quietly on some paper work he still had left when he heard a knock at his door. With out looking up or stopping what he was doing he answered, "Come on in."

The door slid open and tenth squads captain and vice-captain walked in. "Reporting in, Tenth squads Hitsugaya-taicho."

"Reporting in, Rangiku-fukutaicho of the tenth squad."

Byakuya finally look up to see them standing in front of the doorway. "Reporting in? Why to me? I have no need to hear such reports. I'm simply a captain. Not head of Seriete."

"We thought we'd tell you something rather interesting about your... _ex_-lover-"

"You've no need to talk about that. All he is now is my vice-captain of the sixth squad of the thirtee-"

"He's fallen in love again." Hitsugaya interrupted. "This time, his target is Kurosaki Ichigo."

The captain stopped breathing for a couple seconds, snapping into a straighter position. Although he didn't voice it, you could clearly see the pain in his eyes and written all over his face. He was _very_ upset that his lover could leave him for some one like that useless lump of flesh.

"Kuchiki-taicho, are you alright?" Rangiku asked.

"I-I'm fine. Has he told him yet? Renji I mean." His voice started to crack and he could feels tears pushing on his eyes.

"No. He hasn't told Kurosaki yet. Who knows if he'll even tell him." Rangiku answered, a worried look still plastered on her face. "He was really worried about it. He doesn't realize that you finally 'came-out-of-the-closet' and told us that you were his boyfriend. I 'spose you plan on keeping it that way." (Excuse the American terminology. It fit.)

Byakuya's face dropped, but when he spoke, his voice held plain authority, "Thanks for reporting. Go tell the chief commander the real report." The two nodded, and flash stepped out the door. _Renji, please don't hurt Kurosaki the way you've hurt me._

_(Flashback)_

_Renji kissed his lover on the lips, letting his eye's flit from side to side, making sure no one else was around. He pressed a little harder and then let go. He was determined to do today, what he had planned on doing so many times but couldn't bring himself to do it._

"_Renji... is everything... alright?" He asked, planting kisses on his cheek every other word._

"_Um, actually, I have something I need to tell you." Renji looked away, wishing that he wasn't there._

_Byakuya stopped and pulled away from the red head. "What is it?"_

"_I-I can't do this anymore. I'm to worried about image and, well, you've got to uphold your clans name. You can't soil it by being with another man. And don't forget about your late wife. She'd be disappointed if she were here watching you."_

_The larger man took a step back. "So, you're saying,we're finished? We can't be together?"_

"_Well, we _can_ just not intmantely. I'm sorry. Find some one else. Some that will love you forever and who doesn't care about image." Renji, with out looking back, walked out of the room, the tears falling carelessly, soundlessly, down his face._

_Byakuya felt something hot and sticky against his face as he watched his now ex­-lover walk away from him. He put finger against his eyes and was surprised to find wet droplets of water against his finger. He was crying. Renji had meant so much that he was crying. _

(Present Day: End Of Flashback)

Byakuya felt the tears stinging his skin again as he realized that had really lost him. That he would never his one and only true love back. Wiping away the tears, he turned back to his work, concentrating on it instead of the feeling of hate he had pent up inside.

---

With the other two gone, the house seemed eerily quiet. I still sat on the floor, staring at it as if it had the answer to a really hard test question. I still didn't wan to tell him. I didn't want there to be awkwardness between us. "God this sucks," I muttered to myself. "This sucks and love bites. It's hard to tell those you love that you love them especially if you don't know if they'll love you back or not." I flopped onto my back, my legs still crossed. It had been s shitty day and I wasn't in the mood to make it better. I had just confessed my love to the most talkative vice-captain, no, the most talkative person, ever. She was surely going to blab and then _everything_ would be ruined. Except for then, just maybe, I could go back to Kuchiki. I could love him again. Except this time, it wouldn't have to be kept secret.

_You know what? Tomorrow, I'm going to find Kurosaki and hopefully confess. I don't want him to be stolen from me. He's mine and mine alone. _With that, I stood up, dusted my self and walked into my bedroom closing it behind me.

I got dressed quickly and crawled into bed. Right before drifting off, I herd myself mutter, "I love you Kurosaki Ichigo. And there's nothing you, or anyone else, can do about it." I felt my self smile, and then drift into a peaceful, dreamless sleep.

---

Ok, this is the end of chapter two. It's not turning out as great as I had hoped but I hope you're enjoying it any way.

Just to let every one know, the next chapter is most likely going to be in third person so please don't get confused. I have a reason for doing it the way I'm writing it.

**NOTE: I DO NOT OWN BLEACH OR IT'S CHARACTERS. STORY NOT FOR SALE, RENT, OR REPRODUCING.**

**© Stacie Streck 2007-2012**


	3. They Got What They Wanted

_**NOTE** This will most likely be the last chapter. And _yes_ this is written in third person. It's just easier that way. Most of the yaoi is in this chapter. Thanks for being faithful readers._

---

The next morning Renji woke up feeling refreshed and ready for a new day. It took him a minute to realize though that last night had really happened. He had really told the captain and vice-captain of the tenth squad that he was in love with Kurosaki Ichigo. _Shit._ _I really shouldn't have done that. _He sat up and threw the covers off of him and stood up. Rubbing his eyes, he padded to the kitchen to make himself breakfast.

"I'm going to have to tell him today. If I don't, he may be stolen from me." He muttered to himself. He glanced at the clock and sighed. It was only six-thirty A.M. Ichigo was probably getting ready for school and wouldn't be home until three or four. "Then again," he muttered, "I still have to go to work." Sighing, he ate breakfast in silence and went to shower.

The warm water seemed to help him think better. _Why did it have to be him of all people? We met, what? Less than a year ago. And anyway, he's probably got a girlfriend or two hanging around here. Still, I guess it would be good to at least tell him how I feel. Life makes things so complicated. _He shut the water off and climbed out of the tub, the water dripping around him. He wrapped the towel around his waist and walked to his bedroom. Inside, he got dressed quickly, not bothering to put his long red hair up in a ponytail. He looked guyish enough to not be mistaken as a woman.

He walked out of the apartment, locking it behind him, went to his car, started it and drove off to what would be a _long_ day at work.

---

Ichigo woke up to the sun shining in his face. He closed his eyes again, the sun burning into them. He hoped that what he had seen last night would all be a dream. Groaning, he threw the covers back and stood up. Rubbing his eyes with one knuckle, he went and knocked on his closet door. "Rukia?" He called. "It's time for school."

No one answered him. Pulling the door open, he sighed. There was a note sitting on the shelf of the closet which read, _'Ichigo, I'm sorry but I have to leave. I've caused to much trouble for you and your family. From now on, I'll commute from Soul Society to school. I'll see you later. With Love, Rukia'_ That idiot. _She didn't have to leave. Karin's just at an emotional stage in her life._ _Ah well. I'll see her in school at least._

He crumpled the note and threw it in the garbage. He'd talk to her later. Quickly, he got dressed and walked downstairs. Karin and Yuzu already sat at the table eating breakfast. "G'Morning." He said, sitting down.

"Morning." Karin said, not bothering to look up from the paper she was reading.

"Good morning Nii-chan. Where's Rukia-chan this morning?"

"She left early. Had somethings she had to clear up at school." Ichigo lied, feeling a pang of guilt in the pit of his stomach. Things would end up getting complicated like always. Karin would bombard him with questions about why she left so early and if she was going to come back with him after school et cetera.

To his surprise though, she stayed quiet. Yuzu and Ichigo exchanged confused looks and than looked back at Karin. "Are you still mad?" He asked her, hoping the answer would be no.

"Mad? What do i have to be mad about?" Karin asked, flliping to the next page in the newspaper. Regardless of what she said or did, I knew she was still _very _upset about Rukia.

"Rukia-chan," I answered. She seemed to stop breathing for a moment but went back to reading again.

"Why should I be mad about that? She's a friend and she has rights to hang out with you as well. Nothing wrong with that."

"Obviously there is. You practically flinch every time some one mentions her name. You clearly have a severe dislike for her. Anyway, I'll to you guys later." He got up kissed Yuzu on top of the head, ruffled Karin's hair, put his dishes in the sink and ran out the door.

---

At work, Renji stared blankly at the ceiling, thinking about what he was going to have to do this afternoon. Some one tapped him on the shoulder, snapping him back to reality. "Is something wrong?" Asked a petite young woman. This was his assistant Mary Able.

"Oh, Able-san. Sorry. Nothings wrong. Just thinking."

"About what?" She asked, setting down a stack of paper's she had and a cup of tea. Renji looked up at her, wondering if he should tell her. "I-is it too private? I'm sorry. I shouldn't have asked." She turned to leave but Renji grabbed her just in time.

"Please, have a seat." He said, motioning to the chair across his desk. She sat down and looked at him, worry creasing her face. "I-I have a confession to make."

"A confession?" She asked, her face and voice still worried that she had stumbled into something she shouldnt've.

"Yup. A confession. For starters, I'm completely gay. Not Bi not sort of gay but _gay_."

"Y-you're gay? I suppose that's not too big of a surprise." _Well, there goes my chances_, she thought bitterly.

"That's not the biggest surprise I guess. I'm in love with this kid named Kurosaki Ichigo. I haven't told him but I'm not sure I want to. I've known him less than a year and i don't want things to get awkward between us if he says no. Does any of that make sense?" Renji, blushing from giving away most of what he had kept secret for so many years.

"Of course. And did you say Kurosaki Ichigo? We've had so many missing reports on him I'm surprised you even know him. Plus all the trouble he's gotten in." Mary said, staring at Renji.

"Trouble? Him? I can't believe it."

"I would. He's gotten into so many fights we've all lost count. He's sent people to the hospital unconsciencess. He's broken ribs, jaws, backbones, he's torn hair from all over the persons body. Not something many would be proud of. Yet, no one has bothered to send him to juvi for it. There's... something about him that makes everyone, yet no one fear him. It's unusual don't you think?"

Renji just stared and listened. _Yep. That's sounds like him. Doesn't let anybody do _shit _to him._

"That can't _possibly_ be the person you're talking about can it?"

"The exact same. He almost killed me once."

Her hand flew to her mouth, a looked of shock now plastered against her face. "H-how?"

"Sword fight."

"A sword fight in the Twenty-First century?" She asked, her voice disbelieving.

"Yup. Huge swords, many cuts and bruises." He answered. At the moment he didn't really care if she believed him or not.

"I'm taking a guess you're both Shinigami right?"

Renji shot up in his chair. "W-what? That's ridiculous. There's no such thing!"

She looked down at her clasped hands. Her eyes were sad, hopeless. "They really must of all died. Kurosaki you IDIOT! Where will all the souls go now that you _destroyed _it?"

"W-what are you talking about Able-san?"

"I haven't told anyone this but...technically, I'm part of 8th divisions protection squad." She looked up, hope crawling to her eyes.

_I-if she knows, I may as well tell her. _"Now that you mention it, I might as well not lie. Nice to meet you. I'm Aberai Renji, fukutaicho of the sixth squad."

"R-Renji-fukutaicho? G-gomenesai!" Mary stood up quickly and bowed. "I-I had no idea! Please forgive me my rudeness!"

Startled, Renji answered, "Ie. Don't worry about it. So anyway, how did you know about Soul Society and how Ichigo practically destroyed it?"

"Some one called and filled me in. I wasn't too surprised when I heard some one tried to save Kuchiki-san but I _was _surprised when I found out it was some one from this town. Kurosaki has a bad record but is a great kid. You have good choice in men Renji-kun. Good luck with him. He's not one to reject or say no." She stood up and turned, prepared to walk away but before she did, she turned around, her eyes slightly teary, "Just know that I love you. I'll root you on all the way but _never, __**ever**_, forget that I love you."

She turned around again and walked out the door.

Renji watched her go, no knowing whether to stop her and apologize, or just to let her go. He decided just to let her go. There was no point in apologizing when he told her he was gay. It would simply make her feel worse. _I'm sorry Mary-san. You'll find some one else that you love and they'll love you back._

Looking at the clock, Renji realized that he had gotten off work almost half an hour ago. It was four thirty, meaning that Ichigo was probably home already. He stood up, sighed, and walked out the door, saying good-bye to almost every one in the office.

_Now it's time to actually _confess_ instead of saying it to some one who doesn't really care._

---

Ichigo was in his room working on homework when he heard a knock at the door. "Ichii-nii," Came Karin's voice, "some one id here to see you. Says it's important."

_So she's not mad anymore? Yugata! _"Sure. Send him up." Ichigo said.

He heard his sister pad slowly down the steps to the front of the house. There were a few minutes of silence before there was another knock at the door. "Can I come in?" Asked a warm, familiar, voice.

Ichigo's heart stopped for a minute. _What's he doing here? Shouldn't he be in Soul Society?_ "Renji, that you? Come on in." The door clicked as Renji stepped in, closing the door behind him. Ichigo spun around to look at him. He was the same as he had remembered him. Long, flowing, red hair. A muscular body that he longed to hold. And an emotionless, unsmiling face.

"Why are you in the real world?" Ichigo asked, curosity pulling at his brain... and his heart.

"W-well... You're part of the reason. I had, have, something I need to tell you but I don't want it to create awkwardness between us. Does that make sense?" Reji looked at Ichigo, still holding onto the doorknob.

"I guess. There's something I need to tell you as well. I don't want out friendship to be affected though if... you say no." ichigo looked up and met Renji's eyes, a light blush crossing his cheeks. Renji turned his face brightening as well.

Together they thought, unknowing the other was thinking the same thing, _He's so cute!_

All at once, unintentionally together they said, "I love you!" Both of their faces turned a deep scarlet. Neither knew what to say.

"W-what d-did you s-say?" Ichigo asked, his mouth open, hanging.

"I-I love you." Renji answered. He looked down, slightly ashamed. He didn't have too much time to though because Ichigo's chair had clattered to the floor when Ichigo had stood up and ran to him, Wrapping his arms around Renji's neck. He pushed his lips hard to Renji's, not wanting to ever let go.

When he let go he breathed into Renji's ear, "I love you. I love you. I love you."

Renji's tense body relaxed enough for him to wrap his arms around Ichigo's waist. What he had waited so long to get, he finally got. "I love you to." Renji put his mouth to Ichigo's and pushed him towards the bed, there elect lengths brushing the others. Ichigo let his eyes flutter shut, stumbling backwards onto the bed, pulling Renji away from his mouth but pushing him on top of Ichigo. _Ouch! _Ichigo thought when he landed on Renji's hands.

Renji pulled his hands out from under Ichigo and used them to lean on the bed, closer to his face. Ichigo pulled down on his neck making him lose grip on the bed, then making him fall on top of him and, _almost_, regrettably on the erect length. Ichigo pushed his mouth hard against Renji's, not wanting him to go away. Renji rearranged himself into a more comfortable position, hearing Ichigo moan again as he brushed it with his own. Slowly, not wanting to make a wrong move, he ran his hand under Ichigo's shirt and up his side. Ichigo took one arm from Renji's neck and grabbed his arm. "Am I moving to fast?" Renji asked, breaking away from the kiss, worry creasing his voice. Had he already gone to far?

"No. But your hands are cold." Ichigo breathed, smiling.

"What? Oh, sorry." He gave a sheepish smile, forgetting that he had been sweating earlier which had, somehow, made his skin cold.

He was prepared to take his hand out from under the other's shirt but a hand stopped him. Confused, he looked at Ichigo. He was shaking his head, still smiling. "Nuh-uh. Don't you dare stop." Renji couldn't stop himself from smiling. He leaned down again, kissing Ichigo with even more passion, and running his cold hands over Ichigo's nipples. He felt him arch his back into him, the cold touch making his shiver.

Renji pushed the shirt up further, wanting to take it off. Ichigo dropped his arm and broke from the kiss only long enough to rip off the very _confining_ shirt. Renji nibbled along his neck now, biting the more sensitive parts, causing Ichigo to take deep, sharpened breaths. He nibbled along his ear lobe, listening to his heart beat coming from his pounding ears. (Hope you get what I mean) He played softly with the pink nipple, leaning down to suck softly on it, using his other hand to play with the other one. Using his other free hand, he unbuttoned Ichigo's jeans and slipped his hand down them. He grabbed the erect groin, using his middle finger to play with the tip of it.

He tugged at the jeans trying to remove them. Understanding what he wanted, Ichigo lifted himself from the bed, usuing his hands to pull the pants from himself. Renji stopped sucking on it and leaned up to whisper in his new lovers ear, "Got on your hands on knees." Ichigo turned around, not too prepared for what was about to come next.

Renji stuck two fingers into his mouth, just long enough for them to get... _moistened_. Then, he started with one finger. He cringed when he heard Ichigo yelp. He didn't want to hurt him.

"You alright?"

He nodded, not wanting to stop. It hurt but it also felt good.

Renji stook another finger in, receiving another loud yelp from Ichigo. Cringing again, he decided to ignore it. Slowly, he started to move his fingers back and forth, listening every time to Ichigo's yelling. He used his fingers for almost a minute before taking them out, getting a small complaining whimper from Ichigo.

"Don't worry. I'm not done yet." He positioned himself in front of Ichigo, and slid himself. Ichigo screamed, yes _screamed,_ as something unfamiliar was pushed into his body. Renji flinched for it was tight. He leaned over and whispered, "Relax. You're fine."

_Easier said than done!_ Ichigo thought bitterly. He took a deep breath, forcing his body to relax. Again he screamed in agony as Renji pushed himself in further.

He bagan to rick his body back and forth, forcing himself in and out out Ichigo each time. Each time he pushed himself in further, Ichgo yelled louder. Soon though, he found the spot that made Ichigo moan in pleasure. He grabbed Ichigo's length and pumped, moving faster and faster with every thrust. "R-Renji! I'm coming!"

Renji stopped pumping the length and squeezed it with out stopping his other motions. Ichigo yelled out in agony. "What the hell was that for?" He wheezed in between moans.

"Not... hhhnn... yet! Wait for me!" Renji pushed even harder now, faster than he had gone yet. With one last thrust he yelled, "I-Ichigo I'm coming!" He realeased himself into Ichigo as Ichigo released into his hand. They fell on top of eachother breathing hard, and fast.

"Are you sure you're not fucking with me when you tell me you lov me?" Ichigo asked, a serios look on his face.

"I just fucked you. That should be answer enough." Renji muttered, running his hand through Ichigo's hair. He rolled off of him to lay more comfortablly on the bed. Ichigo rolled onto his stomach, draping his arm over Renji's stomach.

Suddenly, there came a knock on his door. He heard it click as some one opened it. He jumped up from the bed and ran over to close it on who ever was there.

"Ichi-nii? Are you alright?" came Yuzu'z muffled voice.

"I'm fine."

"You were screaming..."

"I'm fine. Really! Call me when dinner is ready!"

"That's what I came to tell you. Dinner is done."

"I'll be down there in a while!"

He heard Yuzu sigh but turn and walk down the hall towards the stairs. He listened and waited until he heard her go down the stairs. He returned to the bed and cralwled onto the bed to lay down next to Renji. He sighed in conent. Resting his head against Renji's chest, he listened to the slowly steadying heartbeat.

"I love you." He muttered, his eyelids suddenly _very _heavy.

"I know." Renji muttered, running his finger through Ichigo's hair again. He felt his slowly flutter close. He couldn't hel himself. Right before they both drifted off, he drew the cover's up around them, snuggling closer together.

---

_Author's Last Note: I don't own this is any way. Well, except for the fanfic._

_Anyway, thanks for being faithful readers and reading all the way through. Please review? Onigai?_

_Arigato Mina!_

_© Stacie Streck 2007- Until I no longer write fanfics._


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